Interminable lines
Threaten
The little peace that might
Reside...
Red tape
Banks and health centres
And also to get on
The big wheel...
A drop of sweat
Runs down my spine
And I make a try
As I bide my time
And I see their lives
Procrastinating
Like mine
Longing for a turn
Without a smile
Unable to enjoy anyone’s sympathy
Not even mine.
.
.
posted for OSW
35 comments:
I know this feeling all to well.
Well, here is a long comment, Dulinea:
Some may not believe this, but thos who know me can attest to the fact that lines (queues) give me pleasure. For more than 30 years I have enjoyed having to stand waiting...or sitting on the floor or whatever--and
1. Being in a place where I am required to do NOTHING--because I am not in control
2. Being so happy, to stop the world for those moments or hour
3. Having an opportunity to get to know others there who are obviously suffering in their 'wait' mode
4. Become SO happy to cheer others, by reminding them we all now have a chance to practice our virtues of patience and tolerance
--and then I tell a joke, and others do also!
5. Letting my whole body, mind, heart, and soul gear down to a relaxed state of comfort, and BEING with and in the world of which we all are a part
And Dulce, I see you had to put in a bit of sexiness (I'm probably the only one who had this thought as I read: "A drop of sweat
Runs down my spine..."
PEACE!
Did I write that I liked your poem verrrry much?
What a great image to go with this writing...and so as we wait our turn and life passes...our turn, our procrastination...and we wait for something which we already possess...your poem has place most of the world's thinking in three stanzas...nice work...bkm
yes - yes - yes - and one day it may be too late..
and the image is just perfect with your words dulce and esp. the last two lines are just wow
this is a rather chilling write...made me think of wanting to get picked for games as a kid...
I am there, Dulce. Spoke directly to what I have been feeling these last few days. Displaced, discontented...
haunting but evocative indeed.
Lady Nyo
Bring a Book...
Chill Out...
Serenity Now!
Loved your Poem.....G
The progressive, escalating sense, of an uphill battle is quite striking in your poem. A great choice of images to accompany your words, Dulce. I think many can relate to that point one reaches when even sympathy is difficult to accept.
The words create an entire scenario for the image... or is it the other way around?
Love the verse, gripping -- the image is marvelous as well...
...rob kistner
Image & Verse
"And I see their lives
Procrastinating
Like mine" great line Dulce! The image is perfect!
Really like the flow of words in this one... Great image!
the heart does not die quietly...we all are important and ignored, relevant and missing, special and discarded...each second is an opportunity to discover
Peace, hp
This is dark and accurate. The dehumanizing effect of "take a number and wait in line".
The picture reminds me that we are all waiting to see the light. Thanks for this...I am so resonating with it today.
Love this, and the image is stunning and so perfect for the verse. I often think of the time spent waiting: waiting in lines, waiting for the light to turn green, waiting for my turn at the butcher, baker and candlestick maker. Waiting, waiting, waiting. And thinking, "Come on, come on, hurry up." Hating to lose the time, yet wishing it away. It's a contradiction of logic, isn't it?
Potent imagery, speaking for the innumerable that cannot or will not speak that which they long to, and you, la voz!! In you they are. wow, love it!
Dear Dulce
I enjoyed it very much... slowly you made the simple time, a frustrating moment where your own sympathies are not acceptable as you have put yourself into that situation I guess.. I liked it very much..
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2011/03/whispers-seed-and-senseless-living.html
At Twitter @VerseEveryDay
Hmmm...that's a day shopping...lines, lines and more lines. Great Poem!
And I see their lives
Procrastinating
Like mine
Longing for a turn
Without a smile
You have captured the mood, the atmosphere of the world in which we live. The image is stunning, a line of people waiting to ascend the heights yet the one on top has only one way down. Great words for meditation on this day that will take me to...where?
Waiting, worrying, wishing... I feel it in your piece.
I think that most of us can relate to this one!
May you find your inner symphony again soon!
Nice piece, Dulce!
I can so relate to this Dulce....you have captured the feeling eloquently! Hope you are doing well. Here is a hug :-):-)
The wait seemed like forever….Been there also...
ღ Cคɭm Stiɭɭɳεss ♥ ஆεlεɳa ~.^
oh Dulce, what a way you have of expressing our feelings. Is that how we are all feeling or are you talking to me alone ;)
that feeling of wanting to cut the lines, the red tape and get the hell out of here. Helplessness.
You have stated so very well what happens/has happened to so many in dealing with...
nice write...lovely read
by the way....love the image
Oh wow!! I can sooo relate to this feeling...
That wait makes one impatient, wary and all too knowing..
Loved how you expressed it here, Dulce...
Not that it really matters but, when my life draws to a close, I wish I could find out how many minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, maybe even years, I've spent waiting uselessly in lines, stalled in traffic, etc! Your poem brings it all to mind!
Oh Thank you my dear friends for your so meaningful comments...
No doubt we've all been there, and it's not nice, unless you give it a chance to enjoy yourself (?) with the others... who'd find it hard to smile, for who likes waiting to do something which is not in the least a plasure? It so often happens that after the long waiting you are said you need something else, and so come next day again...:-(
;-)
Dulce
beautiful thoughts.i often wonder what im waiting for. perhaps ive let go and shouldnt have
Crying With A Sense Of Human
Chilling.
You have initiated an interesting dialogue here about being trapped in a queue. I often think that I get into the slowest moving line at border crossings.
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